‘If I quit this project I’m going to reduce stress in the short term, but if I stay I may have some interesting opportunities in the coming months’
‘If I enrol in this course I’m going to get a lot of support and meet a lot of like minded people, but if I don’t, I’m going to save a lot of money and have more free time for my family’.
There are so many different aspects to a decision, so many pro’s and con’s. Weighting them all and determining their priority can be a challenge.
What your heart wants and what is the best rational choice and what you believe is best choice for you and the people in your life.
Last year I read about an American woman who developed a really effective and simple tool to help the steering process through the hurdles of decision making. She calls it: 10 – 10 – 10.
When making a decision, she says, you need to consider the consequences of your decision as they relate to time. More specifically, she suggests considering three perspectives:
1- What consequences will your decision have in 10 minutes?
2- What consequences will your decision have in 10 days?
3- What consequences will your decision have in 10 months?
It seemed far too simple to be as effective as the author claimed, so I tested it and then I tested it again until I discovered something. Every question in its simplicity addresses a specific aspect of the personality.
When I consider the consequences within 10 minutes I get an answer from the child that has little patience, a lot of creative ideas and no time to lose pursuing short terms fun plan. The 10 days term signals the parent energy and its different ideas and priority. This is a more balanced and responsible energy focused on the day-in and day-out rhythm. The 10 months perspective can be the grandparent perspective with a vision for the future, clear and wisely informed.
All it takes is spontaneously answering to the question:
’What consequences will your decision have in 10 minutes?’
This speaks to the part of the personality focused on the short term: immediate result and enjoyment. What makes this investigation fruitful and exciting is to re-discover your own young voice inside with its talents, its point of view and its potential.
‘What consequences will your decision have in 10 days?’ triggers a more down to hearth and responsible voice. What is special and worth discovering about your own responsible voice? Let’s say your down-to-hearth sub-personality is suggesting not leaving a specific project. I certainly would like to have some insight to the reasons why.
What about the more mature and wise aspect of your personality focused on the 10 months timeline? There is so much this voice could reveal to you. This is the voice that can help you connect what you do today to your life long plan.
Asking these three simple questions then is like asking for advice to three influential member of your inner team, three members representing three completely different perspectives and points of view: the child representing the youthful point of you, the responsible parent and the wise grand parent.
My conclusion is that the simplicity of this formula doesn’t reduce its effectiveness. The three straightforward questions set off three key sub-personalities that you can look at for advice in making your decision with more clarity.
It is not much different from making a decision with a team, only the team is an inner team and you have the final word.
© 2008 Lara Briozzo Jagersma
Resources:
Find out more about decision-making:
http://www.larabriozzo.com/PolaritiesEN.html
Read more about sub-personalities
http://www.delos-inc.com/Reading_Room/articlesbyhs.html
Mind map on line your decision process:
Source of the image in the article:
